The Light in the Woods

3/8/10 Insights from Study              I love the Bible parables that remind us that when we have everything there is to have, we don’t need to strive or begrudge. And we do have everything we need, plus much more, when we embrace the loving presence of God in our lives. All it takes to believe in our blessings is to be willing to recognize that it’s only faulty perception blinding us to what we have been provided.

We are stubborn though; it’s hard to believe that what our senses tell us is true is true only in a dream; not in Reality itself. The world seems so concrete to us – it must be real. But the real world is beyond Earth, beyond senses, beyond human intelligence and perception. No wonder it’s hard to believe.

But it’s to our great advantage to believe, because with belief comes intuitive perception whereby we appreciate God’s desire for us to have the best of everything. Only then can we be content; to aspire to spiritual peace. Most of us wait until we die, and so waste our time here on things that don’t matter in Reality. Mystics die to the world on purpose, recognizing the love of God we all receive; recognizing it in such a way as to experience a little bit of heaven here and now without the wait.

In the parable of the Prodigal Son, the father tried to explain to the good brother that all the family has belongs to the good brother anyway; the bad brother can’t take away anything of value and so is not to be hated out of jealousy.

In the parable of the Vineyard Workers, the owner tried to explain that wages are wages; having once agreed to what will be accepted as payment, there is no need for any worker to begrudge what another one gets.

So often we think of life as a race — all this does is make sure we push others out of our way. So often we expect fairness out of all of life’s workings – God does not countenance fairness in His dealings with us because we cannot understand and cannot therefore judge His plan. Life is not an all-or-nothing proposition. Life isn’t a popularity contest or a system of rewards we can count on. Life doesn’t run smoothly on greed — not the greed of the “haves” and not the greed of the “have-nots” for what the “haves” have. A smooth life consists in something much greater than what we traditionally hold dear. When we strive for what will really satisfy us, we find that we look to accept the love of God that reaches out to us constantly. In this endeavor, nothing aspired to on the lower plane can approach, and the favors of the Holy Spirit we wouldn’t think of trading away.

If we take our individuality seriously and place our emphasis on a personal relationship with God, we are more apt to accept His work done in His way. There are so many little things that will not bother us in the least when we dedicate all we have to God’s plan for us. And we have a better relationship with others when we are not always trying to outdistance them on the path to fully appreciating God’s love.

2/23/10 Inspirations          Politics is the ultimate reality show – hype disguised as the real thing. We watch it because it’s real enough to be thrilling and fake enough to be safe. The trouble is we never seem to learn that when politics makes its own reality it takes on a life of its own; the power-people can twist things whichever way they want them to be, and that is the basis on which they make laws. And how they love to make laws! When there’s an opportunity to make another law, if the facts don’t support it other facts must be manufactured.

The same can be said about any facet of life on Earth – politics, religion, science, finance, health, history – the power-people decide reality, and present it to the rest of us as truth so there’s no conflict in their control.

When I think about the fraud on us that might never have been revealed if not for a brave few, I can’t help but think of the deception that is not discovered and how we’ve formed our beliefs on it. I get to the point where it’s wiser not to believe anything anyone tells me, but the yammering is so intense I would have to retreat into an empty cave to get away from it. What good am I in an empty cave? Are we really put on this Earth to be good to one another? If we are, why is power so historically oppressive?

Maybe we do all need an empty cave; one containing an empty chalkboard on which to write only what we can believe for sure. There in the depths of quiet we may have a chance to capture truth and reality. There where there’s only one Power we might begin to receive what we really need to know and something we can really believe. There where we live on only what we’re given without striving on our own, we become humble enough to see clearly what is necessary for us to see.

Mystics enter this empty cave of contemplation whenever they can. With no distraction and no voice other than The One Who Knows, the empty chalkboard receives truth direct from Reality. The hard part is for the mystics to retain this truth and this focus on reality when they leave the cave to return to the world. But that is precisely what keeps the mystic going back to contemplation – the intrusion of a discordant world that never seems to fit right. The more the world yammers at us, the more mumbly it sounds and the clearer God’s voice comes through. That’s the Power I can believe, the Truth that’s without conflict, the Reality that feels right, the Light for which I long.

1/31/10 Reflections          I’ve been thinking a lot about the children’s ward lately — about how it tested my faith in God’s mercy plan, and how it returned me to my faith tenfold over the years through the deep peace of supernatural insight.

While visiting my brother, who was bedridden with multiple sclerosis and in a nursing home, it was necessary for my other brother and I to go to the office on some business. The home was doing some renovations, which made us have to detour through the children’s ward to get to the office. As we were admitted we were told walk straight through, not to interact, and to make as little as noise as possible so as to not disturb the children.

What I saw in the children’s ward is almost beyond description. There were small misshapen bodies in all sorts of contortions; blank expressions on faces that didn’t look like humanity so much as things closeted away until no longer needing care. Their beds or wheelchairs lined both sides of the hallway — as we walked the gauntlet of unspeakable aberrations, in the midst of what the coldest-hearted human would call insufferable, there wasn’t any noise; just the silence of tolerated existence.

When we finally got through the opposite doorway, I told my brother this was a real test of my faith, which depends on the love of God for all His creation. It did one thing, though – it caused me to keep coming back to reflect on what little I know of God’s reasoning, and how I can only believe that what He does He does for our good. Then slowly the lesson of the children’s ward was taught to me within my spirit, and has given me a deeper, more peaceful intuition of the working of God’s love than I think I could have ever had without the experience.

I see now that we cannot care for each other properly. No matter how dire the circumstances and how tirelessly we work for our fellow human beings, we cannot give them what they truly need. Only God can do that. The most dedicated nurse on the children’s ward can only comfort the bodies of the children, and help them remain emotionally neutral.

Their bodies may be decimated, but who knows what they’re seeing inside? Only God can offer that comfort, and somehow I’ve come away with complete assurance that He does. Behind those distorted shells, could the children be experiencing the golden glowing joy of God’s perfect love as do those who have already passed on into His kingdom? If real meaning only exists in another world where God is the only god and our spirits gather Him fully and ecstatically, could those that are physically dependent and mentally unencumbered with worldly priorities be blessed with heavenly bliss here on Earth and unable to tell of it?

In fact, I’ve come into the knowledge that those children are experiencing the beauty of God the way God meant humans to experience Him — how we all would if our minds and bodies were disabled and given over solely to God’s care. In this condition of having nothing else, we enjoy the one thing we do have, unconditionally and without fail — the love of God.

Mystics are able to see the logic of their detachment from the world and negations of self-interest. To them the loss of selfhood is not debilitation so much as essential to experiencing something much better and closer to God’s desires. And those who study the Bible know well the scriptural plea for decreasing so they may increase, giving up all they have and following, taking no scrip for the journey, becoming like little children, the last being first, choosing the good part, letting them deny themselves, taking up the cross, losing their life for God’s sake, having their treasure in heaven, being poor in spirit, crying in the wilderness, the stone the builders rejected, casting in all they had, taking the lowest seat at the feast, seeking the kingdom of God, and entering at the narrow gate.

God should like us to be what we were at creation, before free-will and the sin and suffering that comes from it. For truth, that’s the state He has planned for us to return to in glory. Now, in the world, the independence we asked for has become a thing of strife. The only way to alleviate it is to allow ourselves to become totally dependent on God again so we may look upon His kingdom with joy and hope.

In the children’s ward this has been done for them and they live in the perfect presence of God without effort. Only those who give too much credence to the world and how we perceive it will miss completely what I missed momentarily – that the only thing that matters is the love of God, and whatever state we are in that we can perceive this love the most is the best state to be in. In the measure that we can’t assimilate this, we suffer from our lack of perception. That, then, is true and needless suffering.

I’m not suggesting that those who take care of the residents of the children’s ward don’t provide a heroic service – the need for care of these children’s bodies and emotions is enormous, and I hope for the caregivers’ sake that part of their compensation is the feeling of being blessed to be near these special temples of God’s love. But I am confident that God makes up for suffering by opening up the spirit to supernatural consolation. And this, being the better part, is what God encourages for all of us by our offering of our very selves to Him — a disabling of the ego so as to make His love our spiritual sustenance.

Mystic vision is not apparitions caught by our human senses. Mystic vision is the ability to see things as God sees them; a gift given because we want it badly and allow it freely. Through mystic vision we are able to “know properly” — not the things of this world but the reality of this world as seen from a higher plane. This is a comfort not only to the residents of the children’s ward, but to anyone who can learn exactly what it is they are experiencing. What we can know of God comes down to one necessary specific – that when we seek God we see Him, because that’s what we were made for. And when we see Him we know at once that no matter who we are, or how we look, or what we have or don’t have, without His love we would be nothing and with His love we are everything.

1/5/10 Insights from Study            Yes, God created evil, but to Him it isn’t evil. We have come to see it so, but to God all of His creation is goodness. We are not God, and we see things through human perspective; not divine. We wouldn’t think of calling medicine evil because of its bitter taste, but when it comes to God we expect Him to arbitrate justice without pointing out sin. We expect God to extend His mercy without our having to concede we were wrong. We want His peace without admitting we brought about the conflict. We blame God for what we see as evil, but want Him to overlook consequences of sin, which is something of our own making. How is it we can choose to turn our backs on God, then turn around and blame Him for not preventing us from making a mess of things?

Earthquakes are not evil — they are a natural part of Earth’s regeneration process. When one swallows a car with your loved ones in it, an earthquake appears quite evil to you. But the earthquake did not sin against you, and God is not evil for not having prevented the deaths. If a hungry bear attacks your child, it isn’t because it is evil, nor is God remiss in creating the bear’s need to feed.

Only human beings can perceive God’s created things as evil, because only human beings can create sin out of good and accrue the consequences of their actions. It isn’t that evil is doled out to us as punishment in proportion to our sins so much as it’s that we are simply seeing life as a condition of imperfection. We “know” things as evil because we are used to ordering matters to our own specifications, and often they don’t co-operate.

We insist on exercising our free will and God allows that even when we harm ourselves by it. Unless we are mystics, we would not be willing to give up our free wills, even when we know we often use them with harmful results. Unless we are spiritually enlightened, we are unaware of all the cases where God has in fact intervened to save us. We are just as unaware of this as we are unaware of His reasons for permitting us to witness evil. Opportunity, correction, guidance, education, conversion, grace – all good things can appear to us as evil when directed by God’s hand, because we do not understand divine intellect. We cannot assimilate the intensity of God’s love for us and the steps He takes because of this love.

This is why mystics are always encouraging a person’s abandonment of will. It’s saying this: “I’m not divine and can only haltingly absorb divine reasoning. But if I make a point of accepting God’s will as good, no matter whether it seems to me to be loving or evil, I will certainly be at peace knowing my way won’t be wrong. If I unite my desires to God’s, even if I don’t understand them, I’m confident that I’m doing God’s will and showing Him love. And if I do this sincerely, humbly, and obediently, I will be shown by insight what I need to know, and be given the means to do what I need to do. When I am in sync with God all decisions are God’s, even the ones He has subjected to my free will.”

In this desire for union with God we’ll not only have assurance of following the path our Creator means for us to follow, but also we will have a more proper perception of the worldly, temporary nature of suffering and evil.

12/25/09 Insights from Prayer              Christmas proves what every mystic knows from experience – God has many ways of appearing to us. It’s not always about majesty and power – our connections with God’s word are usually no more spectacular than another baby being born. But what mightiness there is in small things when we can recognize them as the presence of God. I feel sorry for anyone who can’t grasp the workings of God for their own experience. That God walks among us even here and now should inspire awe in us all. Life is a house of cards in the wind – it’s only God holding us up that makes us possible. We really are seeing God, but we see Him in an unfamiliar way – with the eyes of the spirit. Lately I feel as though we have drifted so far off the trail again that it’s time for God to come to us in a way we can see with our bodily vision. Would we greet Him with relief and joy, or crucify Him once more?

12/19/09 Inspirations               When it comes to the things of God, how much can we human beings really know? What portion of what our ancestors said is really true? Given what we know of the history of mankind, and through our own experiences of human nature, what are we to believe?

As in everything pertaining to the mystical life, the first thing necessary for reflection is to put God first, ahead of worldly considerations and human input, because through this door lies only what God desires for us to hear. That means mystics, because they come from many beliefs, must as always pare down dogma and build up intuition. As we honor the Creator, we honor His methods, which are shaped to the individual and are varied beyond our comprehension. Our trust is in God’s word to us and through others with God’s inspiration in our spirits.

Remembering that Devotional Mysticism is an attitude of worship and not a religion itself, we must also remember that it is a practice open to all faiths, all denominations, and all individuals – excluding no one, as does God. Many mystics are Christians, and many non-Christian mystics believe in Jesus. Because of the varied interpretations God gives us, a discussion of Jesus and mysticism, to be relevant to all mystics, starts out simplified in the masses and will be built upon by the individual from within his own belief system.

A mystic interpretation may be that in Jesus God was saying “I will meet you where you live. I will come to you; to be among you and within you. In doing this, I will show you the things that I admire so you can follow my wishes through your free will. I will show you that if all in this life is not pleasant, you can look with joy to your own resurrection. From My manifestation on your level – separated as you are from Me by deception – you will find I’m a loving God, a merciful God; dedicated to you even when you turn your back on Me. I teach you compassion for others; I show you your own weaknesses so you too can be merciful to My other children. I bring you the promise that I will keep coming to you asking for your love — being pleased anytime you show it and merciful anytime you don’t. In other words, I have the capacity to communicate with you, and I do it in many different ways – ways that conform to what you can relate to. You call these manifestations of Myself by the names that mean something to you – Son of God, nature, Jesus, miracle, inspiration, Holy Spirit, co-incidence – because if my glory is beyond you I can have no real meaning for you. I am first your Creator, and I care for you in many ways while you’re away from me. Nothing pleases me more than that you would wait patiently for me with total confidence, see what I am to you, dedicate yourself to my will, and most of all love me with all you have.”

The important thing is that God can speak to us as Jesus and we will hear a powerful message. Christmas is a perfect time to reflect on this message in awesome wonder that God can and does put all His love into mankind despite what mankind can do.

12/6/09 Inspirations                Belief or disbelief in God is probably the most analyzed issue in the world. It is of interest to everyone, it crosses national boundaries, it transcends the political, it concerns many parts of our lives, and it’s an emotional issue to anyone who has it brought out into the open. We all have an opinion about God, even if our belief system beyond that might be confusing and incompletely analyzed.

Even among those who believe in God, there is diversity of opinion, or maybe it’s better to cite a diversity of emotion. There are different gods, different paths to the same God, differently perceived attributes of God, different scriptures, different beliefs as to God’s interaction or disinterest in human affairs, and many other differences that make each of us unique.

I believe in the Creator because there’s no other alternative that I can find. We know next to nothing of all there is to know, so it stands to reason that somebody knows, and that somebody must be very powerful, because we are here. All we see for certain is that we are the most advanced civilization on Earth that’s ever been, and we did not and cannot create a planet, let alone the universe.

In mysticism, the theology is that God may make something of himself knowable if it fits His design, but as soon as we know something about Him we also come to understand how extremely far we are from even scratching the surface. This brings us reverence for the awesome work of God, and hope that when we return to Him we will be sharing in His greatness.

It’s as if someone were to put a pinch of sand under a microscope and tell you to count to see how many grains there are. No sooner do you come up with a number than they put a spoonful of sand in a bowl and request the same thing. Now you’re uncomfortable, because the job is hard and the hours are long. But you do it — and then they come in with a cup of sand on a plate. As you start in counting, you think of the Sahara and the nature of mathematics.  Even though more are being made as we work, there are a finite number of grains of sand in the desert yet an infinite supply of numbers with which to count them. In other words, the job is possible, but we can’t do it. We feel that God, on the other hand, is powerful enough to know the number of grains of sand in the universe. To mystics, this is a cause of great joy; not despair.

Yesterday I heard the results of a poll of those who believe in God. The question was: how big a part of your life does religion play? I’m sure everyone who answered the poll came up with a reasonable answer. But think about the question very carefully; mull it over a bit in your mind. Is anyone really qualified to say? Isn’t God the only one who actually knows?

11/28/09 Reflections          What’s missing in the world isn’t love, for each and every one of us is loved so immeasurably that we cannot even absorb the concept. But that’s what’s missing – our ability to recognize the immensity of God’s love for us, and our ability to expand the scope of our intellect enough to desire to experience God more than we have.

Today is a special day for me – the anniversary of the moment when God took hold of my mind, my imagination, and my ego and showed me how little I’ve been settling for. He chose me and I accepted. He chooses many, and many accept. If they’re like me, they enjoy a flurry of supernatural favors, causing them to experience extreme joy and contentment. Then just when they grow to expect joy, they’re handed complete letdown.

We are fortunate that there have been those who have gone before us and left accounts, as accurately as they might be in explaining the unexplainable, of how it feels. And I’ve been particularly fortunate in that I’ve had the means to teach myself the theology behind God’s personal involvement in my life. Because of this, I have an understanding of why we must suffer after having a taste of deep spiritual knowledge and grace. And I know that the suffering of perceived estrangement from God is followed by, not the initial ecstasy, but something more stable and more sustainable. It’s the continual awareness of the awesome presence of God and the certitude that this is but a small taste of a banquet yet to come.

11/21/09 Insights from Study         When Mysticism is practiced as an adjunct of one’s Christian beliefs, there can be a flood of understanding released that is nothing short of miraculous. Many report reading the gospels with such new insight that they feel they have finally seen them for the first time for what they are. When Mysticism is practiced outside of Christian beliefs, there is often a logical pointing to the gospel for those who can and will welcome the experience.

There is nothing inherent in Mysticism that deviates from Christian principles – one must have the open mind of a mystic to realize this. Even if you are just beginning the mystic path you will recognize in God’s will the principles of Jesus Christ. To Christians this might seem elementary because Jesus is, after all, God. To those who know only that Jesus Christ was a “good person”, the element of goodness resonates in the spirit in perfect harmony. “Goodness” is the same principle for everybody despite the different degrees we assign it to spin things towards our own human agendas.

So it’s often a natural progression from “God is good and Jesus is good” to “God’s will is Christ’s will”. It’s supernatural how unwavering the desire for Jesus is when He is met through the New Testament. Christians believe this is the work of the Holy Spirit, who is God as well. The mystical filling of willing spirits with God’s Holy Spirit is not only mysticism’s main premise, but Christ’s ultimate purpose. The Holy Spirit as bridging between man and God is surely Mysticism’s focus as well as one of Christianity’s most important dogmas.

The beauty of Mysticism’s association with God is pure in concept for anyone. It weaves in and out of organized religions and draws non-believers into its purity of divine love infused, empowering, and passed along. The association of Mysticism with the teaching of Christ is inescapable, because they have the same source and the same purpose.

11/20/09 Spiritual Presentations

Every morning this time of year we prepare the boat and leave the dock; the same raven appears and accompanies us for miles as we make our rounds. There are other ravens around, but only one follows us throughout our work. I think this is the third fall this oddity has taken place, and I suspect it’s the same raven each year.

I’m under no delusion that most animal behavior is not food-oriented. But this goes well beyond that kind of motivation. The raven merely goes with us, and when we land at the dock again back home, it goes back to whatever it does all day and we notice it no more.

This of itself is amazing, but today it took on a new twist. As I usually do, I was meditating and praying as I rode in the boat. Today I was thinking of the morning devotional on which the prayer “Hasten, O God, to save me; O Lord, come quickly to help me.” (Psalm 70:1) was being expounded. I thought of this prayer to God in conjunction with the raven as a sign from God, and I wondered if the two might come together as one manifestation – sort of like the mystic experience as prayer and presence coming together.

As soon as I said the prayer with this thought in mind, the raven lowered its flight to just above me in the boat; keeping up with us perfectly in sync as if all else was standing motionless, and it began calling continuously. Never had the raven approached the boat this closely before, and never did it call continuously. That it chose this moment to do this was for me not a surprise, but a validation.

My husband always said his Indian family believed it possible to come back after death as an animal. In fact we’ve been calling this raven “My Old Grandmother”. I don’t believe we come back after death at all, but I very much believe in the ability of God to reach out to make Himself known to us in any way He wishes. He has put me in the state of mind where I can welcome and expect this visitation, and I have used my free will to recognize and accept His attention.

What a joy it is to be in harmony with God and to know it. It is a cycle of being loved and loving that keeps validating itself the more it goes around. I’m grateful for whatever good spins off from this cycle of love between Creator and creation.