The Light in the Woods

3/8/10 Insights from Study              I love the Bible parables that remind us that when we have everything there is to have, we don’t need to strive or begrudge. And we do have everything we need, plus much more, when we embrace the loving presence of God in our lives. All it takes to believe in our blessings is to be willing to recognize that it’s only faulty perception blinding us to what we have been provided.

We are stubborn though; it’s hard to believe that what our senses tell us is true is true only in a dream; not in Reality itself. The world seems so concrete to us – it must be real. But the real world is beyond Earth, beyond senses, beyond human intelligence and perception. No wonder it’s hard to believe.

But it’s to our great advantage to believe, because with belief comes intuitive perception whereby we appreciate God’s desire for us to have the best of everything. Only then can we be content; to aspire to spiritual peace. Most of us wait until we die, and so waste our time here on things that don’t matter in Reality. Mystics die to the world on purpose, recognizing the love of God we all receive; recognizing it in such a way as to experience a little bit of heaven here and now without the wait.

In the parable of the Prodigal Son, the father tried to explain to the good brother that all the family has belongs to the good brother anyway; the bad brother can’t take away anything of value and so is not to be hated out of jealousy.

In the parable of the Vineyard Workers, the owner tried to explain that wages are wages; having once agreed to what will be accepted as payment, there is no need for any worker to begrudge what another one gets.

So often we think of life as a race — all this does is make sure we push others out of our way. So often we expect fairness out of all of life’s workings – God does not countenance fairness in His dealings with us because we cannot understand and cannot therefore judge His plan. Life is not an all-or-nothing proposition. Life isn’t a popularity contest or a system of rewards we can count on. Life doesn’t run smoothly on greed — not the greed of the “haves” and not the greed of the “have-nots” for what the “haves” have. A smooth life consists in something much greater than what we traditionally hold dear. When we strive for what will really satisfy us, we find that we look to accept the love of God that reaches out to us constantly. In this endeavor, nothing aspired to on the lower plane can approach, and the favors of the Holy Spirit we wouldn’t think of trading away.

If we take our individuality seriously and place our emphasis on a personal relationship with God, we are more apt to accept His work done in His way. There are so many little things that will not bother us in the least when we dedicate all we have to God’s plan for us. And we have a better relationship with others when we are not always trying to outdistance them on the path to fully appreciating God’s love.

2/14/10 Insights from Prayer         I’m convinced that if more of us understood the beauty of a divine relationship the world could start to heal. I can’t imagine being scared of a one-on-one relationship with the Creator, but apparently many of us are. We tend to be more comfortable in groups – groups of like race, religion, gender, causes, economic class, location, interests. All these things are fine to consider, but they make us dependent, and dependent on the wrong things.

Sometimes our groupings hold us back from the one thing that can easily bring us joy – a relationship with our Creator. We often look to a group to help us gain this very thing, and often go away disappointed. A union with God is not a group activity. It is much too special to be anything but an individual commitment. That’s because each of us is specially-made and, in the eyes of God, uniquely loved.

If you really think this over, it’s quite an awesome arrangement. We each have the power of God at our disposal, just for the asking. We are worthy of the asking, for not only are we God’s children, but God is extremely involved in our welfare. He likes for us to put our dependence on Him, because He knows He’s all for our good.

This is intentionally simplified; there are many other considerations. But the point here is that we would be so much happier if we let God do for us what He would like to do. It’s so simple if we start thinking interiorly – that is, with our willing reception of supernatural grace. We often don’t realize how much we desire God; how lost we feel and how homesick we are. Only when we give our selves over to Him do we then realize what we’ve been given and how much better things are when these graces are fully appreciated.

Let’s not substitute something less for the best we already have. Let’s turn to the divine instead of our human groupings to realize our potential joy. God is available to you every second you live. Your relationship with Him is up to you – something you will know how to seek out because your desire for it is always within you. Stand alone and turn inside yourself to experience the ecstasy of God.

1/31/10 Reflections          I’ve been thinking a lot about the children’s ward lately — about how it tested my faith in God’s mercy plan, and how it returned me to my faith tenfold over the years through the deep peace of supernatural insight.

While visiting my brother, who was bedridden with multiple sclerosis and in a nursing home, it was necessary for my other brother and I to go to the office on some business. The home was doing some renovations, which made us have to detour through the children’s ward to get to the office. As we were admitted we were told walk straight through, not to interact, and to make as little as noise as possible so as to not disturb the children.

What I saw in the children’s ward is almost beyond description. There were small misshapen bodies in all sorts of contortions; blank expressions on faces that didn’t look like humanity so much as things closeted away until no longer needing care. Their beds or wheelchairs lined both sides of the hallway — as we walked the gauntlet of unspeakable aberrations, in the midst of what the coldest-hearted human would call insufferable, there wasn’t any noise; just the silence of tolerated existence.

When we finally got through the opposite doorway, I told my brother this was a real test of my faith, which depends on the love of God for all His creation. It did one thing, though – it caused me to keep coming back to reflect on what little I know of God’s reasoning, and how I can only believe that what He does He does for our good. Then slowly the lesson of the children’s ward was taught to me within my spirit, and has given me a deeper, more peaceful intuition of the working of God’s love than I think I could have ever had without the experience.

I see now that we cannot care for each other properly. No matter how dire the circumstances and how tirelessly we work for our fellow human beings, we cannot give them what they truly need. Only God can do that. The most dedicated nurse on the children’s ward can only comfort the bodies of the children, and help them remain emotionally neutral.

Their bodies may be decimated, but who knows what they’re seeing inside? Only God can offer that comfort, and somehow I’ve come away with complete assurance that He does. Behind those distorted shells, could the children be experiencing the golden glowing joy of God’s perfect love as do those who have already passed on into His kingdom? If real meaning only exists in another world where God is the only god and our spirits gather Him fully and ecstatically, could those that are physically dependent and mentally unencumbered with worldly priorities be blessed with heavenly bliss here on Earth and unable to tell of it?

In fact, I’ve come into the knowledge that those children are experiencing the beauty of God the way God meant humans to experience Him — how we all would if our minds and bodies were disabled and given over solely to God’s care. In this condition of having nothing else, we enjoy the one thing we do have, unconditionally and without fail — the love of God.

Mystics are able to see the logic of their detachment from the world and negations of self-interest. To them the loss of selfhood is not debilitation so much as essential to experiencing something much better and closer to God’s desires. And those who study the Bible know well the scriptural plea for decreasing so they may increase, giving up all they have and following, taking no scrip for the journey, becoming like little children, the last being first, choosing the good part, letting them deny themselves, taking up the cross, losing their life for God’s sake, having their treasure in heaven, being poor in spirit, crying in the wilderness, the stone the builders rejected, casting in all they had, taking the lowest seat at the feast, seeking the kingdom of God, and entering at the narrow gate.

God should like us to be what we were at creation, before free-will and the sin and suffering that comes from it. For truth, that’s the state He has planned for us to return to in glory. Now, in the world, the independence we asked for has become a thing of strife. The only way to alleviate it is to allow ourselves to become totally dependent on God again so we may look upon His kingdom with joy and hope.

In the children’s ward this has been done for them and they live in the perfect presence of God without effort. Only those who give too much credence to the world and how we perceive it will miss completely what I missed momentarily – that the only thing that matters is the love of God, and whatever state we are in that we can perceive this love the most is the best state to be in. In the measure that we can’t assimilate this, we suffer from our lack of perception. That, then, is true and needless suffering.

I’m not suggesting that those who take care of the residents of the children’s ward don’t provide a heroic service – the need for care of these children’s bodies and emotions is enormous, and I hope for the caregivers’ sake that part of their compensation is the feeling of being blessed to be near these special temples of God’s love. But I am confident that God makes up for suffering by opening up the spirit to supernatural consolation. And this, being the better part, is what God encourages for all of us by our offering of our very selves to Him — a disabling of the ego so as to make His love our spiritual sustenance.

Mystic vision is not apparitions caught by our human senses. Mystic vision is the ability to see things as God sees them; a gift given because we want it badly and allow it freely. Through mystic vision we are able to “know properly” — not the things of this world but the reality of this world as seen from a higher plane. This is a comfort not only to the residents of the children’s ward, but to anyone who can learn exactly what it is they are experiencing. What we can know of God comes down to one necessary specific – that when we seek God we see Him, because that’s what we were made for. And when we see Him we know at once that no matter who we are, or how we look, or what we have or don’t have, without His love we would be nothing and with His love we are everything.

12/30/09 Insights from Study                   If you want things to focus for you spiritually, consider how much human knowledge you have in your brain; clear that out completely in moments of contemplation and give room to let God-knowledge fill your head. You cannot understand the limitlessness of God-knowledge until you temporarily throw out your dependence on your own intellect.  What you know of the world takes over and limits what you can know of heaven. Trapped by issues of time and space as it is, your brain doesn’t use but a fraction of what it could.  If you mentally remove thoughts of sense and emotion and place yourself sincerely at the will of God, you make your mind receptive to what is divinely possible. Don’t hold back out of fear of evil or delusion – these are worldly functions from which God protects those who invite Him in.

12/13/09 Reflections                 The job of the world is a simple one. It doesn’t matter what your vision of God is – as long as you appeal to goodness, you love your Creator. It’s not difficult to do, and from where we are we might be amazed to know how well the world already does this. The world isn’t as bad off as it seems – much is said about its negative aspects, but then little is reported about our spiritual state. You think global spirituality will never happen, but the world has already come a long way toward it. The great religions, and most of the obscure ones, are all based on goodness. From the time human beings were created, we have looked up to the Creator in awe and wonder, looking for goodness from Him and within ourselves.

You don’t even have to believe in the Creator in order to worship Him. Even atheists show honor to God each time they do something good for others. Goodness doesn’t have to spring from religion; goodness reflects on God no matter what we believe, because God is goodness Himself. The job is simple because it comes naturally to us. We are our own reward system. Of course there are objects pulling us the other way, but while they may provide happiness, they don’t provide safety and contentment. And there are always the spoilers, who seem to thrive on evil, yet who can say how they are inside?

But global goodness doesn’t take global government – that would be sure to polarize people because government is about power, and only one power can reign supreme, leaving lesser powers resentful. It takes individuals working on a local scale with what they know and the means to advertise it.

It’s absolutely amazing how our lives intertwine and intersect, though we be total strangers. Now with the availability of instant communication worldwide via the internet it’s infinitely more possible to have an effect on someone without even knowing it. Interestingly, the probability of this being a polarizing factor is just as likely as it being something that brings us together. But the point is – it’s getting harder and harder to deny that, living under the same sun, we may have a lot more in common than the ten o’clock news might imply. We are not as diverse as we think because in God’s eyes we are all the same — everything!

Our differences can’t cancel out our overriding essence – we are all spiritual beings lost in a world of matter. Any differences we have are superficial, because only the spirit matters in the great scheme of things. Our one job is to care for our spirits and encourage, whether actively or passively, others to care for theirs. If left alone we do this naturally, because all spirits are the same and we know others’ exactly as well as we know ours. The difference is only in the degree of the grace we allow to pervade our spirits. It’s the goodness of God that wishes to live in us, and the joy we receive from His presence (our spirits are lifted) makes us tend to want to cooperate in this plan.

But we are spirits in a material world, and there is happiness to be had. Material happiness is not evil, but what it does is prevent the spirit from being filled with God through the neglect that comes from our preoccupation with worldly things. The body is the tool that moves us through the world. The mind is the lever that makes the body go. The soul is the emotion that directs the mind toward which levers to pull. All this for not only survival, but for happiness.

None of this though is the essence of what we really are – that is the spirit. The spirit is the container for however much of God we are willing to invite. In the end it is what of us survives for eternity. If it is full of God we have joy; if it isn’t, we have longing for God. The filling of the spirit with God takes place now and continues until perfection is reached. Allow God in, and seeing as God seeks all spirits, encourage others to allow God in. Make God more important to you and the effects of this will spill over to the lives of others as well.

12/4/09 Insights from Prayer        We are all in exile but we can stand anything when we keep our emotions centered on home. If we try to fit in with imperfection we will never be at ease, because we were made for better than that. When we put it all on the Creator we are consoled, for we know two things: He will act on our behalf perfectly, and He is honored when we give up our disordered priorities in favor of His perfect ones.

The world frightens us because it is filled with human-powered sin. It’s this sin, not the will of God, that causes us our agony. Whether it is we who are doing the sinning or not, we all suffer together because we must experience imperfection together. Sins committed, sins of omission, emotions unbridled, annoyances personified, addiction, prejudice, wanting what we don’t have, putting forth too much reverence for what we do have, making too much of ourselves – any sin we commit or weakness we give into is a sign that our spirits are in disorder. And no wonder – we were not made for this world at all.

This world is what our lives look like when we look at them wrong. God created us for perfection and so that is what we are. But God allowed us to reject Him, and we pay for it by being blind to the reality of our perfection. We are in exile; this doesn’t feel right to us at all. We’re missing something and most of us don’t understand that it is the perfect relationship with God that we’re craving. That’s why our spirits feel as if they’re never contented.

We can’t bring our spirits back to perfection here, because “here” itself is imperfection. This world is only the medium of misperception which is the result of our disassociation from God. It isn’t real, and that should be a comfort to us, to know that one day we will again have perfect vision of reality. Until then there is only hope.

What makes the world of exile bearable is God’s mercy, and His power of consolation available to us when we ask for it. Each experience of worldly beauty gives us a glimpse of promise – God’s word that He is present and wishes to remind us of the joy that reigns where we are headed. When we see this beauty, we ought to immediately connect to the Creator who brought it about. The more we think of God, the more hints He gives into our immortal existence, and the more hopeful we are. God answers the confusion and suffering we experience in this world with better perception of the beauty and perfection that is our real life. The more we honor God the easier we see through our exile and into our reality, and the less anxiety we will have with our earthly, temporary trials when we recognize the joy that is to come.

11/25/09 Insights from Prayer           What greater honor could I show to my Creator than to give Him my full attention? He made me perfectly, He watches over me in my trials, and He lives with me on a higher plane, which I will again understand fully when time is over for me. He gives me His full attention and His full capacity for love, and that is a great deal of attention and love indeed. My contribution is to love and honor Him with the most of what I have to give.

This gets harder and harder as my society turns its back on God, and the culture I live under no longer resembles anything I care for. But I am full of faith and willing for God to be my government no matter who it offends. I love the allegory of the Hound of Heaven because it reminds me that no one can unbelieve the truth out of reality; no one can change truth by their opinion, or make reality disappear by willing it so.

We have an innate drive to connect with our Creator. The more others deny Him, the more we seek Him. The more we allow Him in, the better we are at it. The more others try to suppress our devotion, the greater our need to seek God.  And the more our detractors succeed in their persecution, all the more consumed we are in carrying on our worship of God from within our spirit – that secret place where only God and His child can go.

There we are not judged, but simply loved. There we finally find what we need, and our persecutors become God’s means for our joy and contentment. Therefore, love your enemy – he brings you closer to God as part of God’s design. And if he is your enemy because of your spirituality, he is an even greater blessing. Much as some hate the thought of it, there is no way anyone can stop me from praying for them, as the beauty of prayer lies in its unobtrusiveness. You can’t see me praying for you, but I wonder – can you feel the Hound of Heaven closing in behind you?

11/22/09 Insights from Study              The way the world destroyed Jesus is the way it tries to destroy those who avail themselves of Jesus’ blessings. There are those who think of this life as all there is and because of that they live only for worldly desires. These people despise the thought of the real life to come, because they assume preparing for it would mean giving up their Earthly ways.

When they encounter someone who ascribes to a higher plane of spirituality there is resentment and a need to test this focus. There are many forms of persecution, and the more secular the society, the more extreme the justification for the persecution.

Buy my spirituality cannot be realized by anyone other than me and God. It cannot be measured in worldly increments and cannot be tested against worldly standards. You can kill me to prove that God will not save me, but God might not have worldly purposes in mind when He saves. The realm of reality to which I go is not a place where you can follow me, and so you’ll never know the results of your test.

It was not the death of Jesus that enlightens us to God’s design so much as His resurrection. If you do not see beyond this world, you cannot reasonably test someone who does; you will not recognize the promise of the resurrection unless you yourself experience it. Your persecution of the spiritually-minded will be counter-productive because it only validates the righteousness of those you persecute.

11/9/09 Inspirations           God has everything. But there is one thing to have that is meaningless if not received from someone else. God would like to be loved. That is why He created us in His image – with free wills so that we can voluntarily love Him. For what good is love if it is mandated instead of freely given? Even if you’re God, love has to be received to be meaningful.

Here on Earth, the distortion of reality is the result of free wills used for other purposes than to honor God. But that makes the love potential all that much more significant, because our love for God can come through above human weakness and human suffering, without which there would be nothing for love to overcome.

When we come out of this coma of life on Earth and enter the reality of heaven, we will love and honor God without question, as divine beings. But here and now, love for God does not come so easily; here our humanity takes hold of us and demands all we’ve got. How specially it must please God then, when we freely volunteer to love Him despite the strikes against it! This is love in the extreme; valuable because it comes from self-willed creations who can and, indeed, are of a nature to withhold it.

To mystics then, this is the greatest privilege and the focus of life itself – to honor God by loving Him. Despite all it might take to get to that point, the commission is simple — all we do is honor our Creator by loving Him. Rites and groupings and dogmas and scriptures are redundant, because we know how to love God without all these things. To love God is, after all, what we were created for.

In this we embark on a journey that will not fail, for the moment we decide for God, all His power and knowledge is at our disposal in the measure that we allow ourselves to ask for it and to put it to use. And one spark of love sent to God is returned in a totality we can’t even grasp, but know in our hearts is how reality will feel when we reach it at last.

10/1/09 Reflections               It’s hard for us to just be. It’s natural to be cooking dinner, be preparing for a meeting, be disciplining a child, be checking out what’s on TV. But in the midst of life as we live it, everything we do is constantly measured by what came before and what will come after. We never seem to just be.

If you were suddenly snatched up from your place on Earth and plunked down on Mars, you would be forced to live in that present moment because Martian past and future is meaningless to you. The present is all you would have and it’s there you would live. In such a situation, where you are stripped of all faculties of intellect, will, and memory, it becomes just you and your Creator and the very moment that is existing. Is it any wonder that this is the situation which is conducive to communication with God?

We make this escape, sometimes unconsciously, by projecting ourselves into a scene far removed from reality. A driver in rush-hour traffic may longingly imagine being instead in a field of gently-waving grass, where all that needs to be done is to “just be”.

If we’re lucky, we have an actual place we can go to hide ourselves away from activity – a quiet garden, a forest trail, a dark closet smelling of cedar. In these places we experience life as it is without us or the cares that move us. If, for example, you are gazing at a rock in a stream, you might realize that the rock exists only in the present. It doesn’t change its being no matter what goes on with the rest of the world. Financial needs, political mayhem, mental meltdown, the next terrorist attack – the rock will still be there where God put it, doing what God asks of it. What a wonderful thing if I, with my free-will capabilities, would choose to be as complacent as this rock!

For mystics, the retreat that recharges our living in the present is contemplative prayer. Here we place ourselves in front of God and away from the things of the world, receptive to God’s input far from the distractions of time and space. Here, with no action of our own, we exist as God would have us; totally attentive to him and doing what we are supposed to do.  It’s a liberating feeling to be pleasing God, and what we get from this prayer we can take back with us to our everyday lives so that we are in effect praying constantly.